Recovering The SelfA Journal of Hope and Healing


Loud People Are The Most Insecure Ones, Psychology Says

There’s always that one person in the crowd or in our group at work or in college who is the life of the party. They talk and laugh so loudly that the spotlight is almost always on them. These individuals are really outgoing and sociable and simply radiate self-confidence.

They are also probably the ones who throw in a line or a joke for almost any situation or comment. What we know is that we like being around these people and some of us wish we could only be as charismatic as they are.


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This is about to surprise because apparently, these people are the most insecure ones. How does that work?

Well, oftentimes these people are so loud and outgoing because they want to camouflage their insecurities. Being in a joking mode the whole time could be the mask they choose to wear when they’re really feeling sad.

Some of them may even appear arrogant or self-absorbed, but again, they are merely trying to hide a low self-esteem.

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The loud behavior is all about seeking validation and getting the attention they feel they need. Some of us probably do this without even being aware of it.

Whereas people who are genuinely confident and have a solid sense of self-worth won’t feel the need to have others reassure them. They are quiet and reserved because they don’t have anything to hide. Moreover, they don’t need validation from external sources.

Here are some factors that can contribute to low self-esteem:

Unhealthy relationship with parents – Not getting enough affection or attention while growing up can seriously damage our self-esteem.

Peer pressure – Bullying in school or high-school can again make us become more withdrawn or more insecure.

Past trauma – People who have suffered emotional or physical abuse tend to develop low self-esteem.

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Negative thinking – People can be put down by others or they can put themselves down with rumination and an excessive and unhealthy negative attitude.

Unsatisfying physical traits – Low self-esteem can also be triggered by a consistent dissatisfaction with the way we look.

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Recovering The Self is a forum for people to tell their stories. Individual contributors accept complete responsibility for the veracity, accuracy, and non-infringement of their reporting.
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