Recovering The SelfA Journal of Hope and Healing


Healing With Your Best Friend

Guest Blogger: Monta Fleming

It feels like just yesterday you were sitting on the couch with your best friend, talking about that boy you met in class and then crying over him two weeks later. You planned your weeks and weekends around each other’s class schedules. Your biggest concern was whether or not you have enough money to buy that hot dress you saw at the mall and if you studied enough to pass your big exam. There weren’t diapers, husbands, and finances to work on… yet. Then life hits us all and all of a sudden…

Your best friend meets a boy and falls in love; you celebrate her wedding; and before you know it, she has moved into their first home together. You follow suit and like you, she stands by your side. Grown up dates with the husbands in tow and staying out late just to catch up on everything new. Then just like before, life hits us. The news arrives and you are pregnant! Baby clothes and baby showers are thrown and late night calls consisting of tears brought on by the hormones. Pinky promises are made that you will always make time for each other and that you won’t ever turn out to be like your naggy mother.

Now flash forward to a few years and today you are running around trying to drop the kids off at their piano lessons and making enough time to run to the market. Life happens. When did we all grow up and start living the lives we only joked about over wine and dinner. Phone calls become less, visits and date nights become more of a dream. Before you know, it has been 6 months since you last saw her and 3 months since your last conversation that didn’t contain, ‘Got to go, baby just spit up everywhere!’

Big and bad things happen in life. Whether it’s financial problems or marriage woes, these things will happen. And there comes a time when you can no longer carry the burden for yourself and you need to turn to someone. That is where your best friend comes into play. It’s okay to rely on her for support. Your best friend is the person that slaps the silly out of you and brings you back to down to reality. She has no problem telling you are being a brat and laughs at you while saying it. If others were to be this tough with you, you would write them off and perhaps get your feelings hurt. But because she is your best friend, you expect none the less from her. What is amazing about your best friend is that you two can go months without talking and then you can call her up and cry your frustrations out and she listens.

You have a significant other and your family to rely on, but there is nothing like the love of your best friend. It is important to keep in touch as often as you can; the more is the better. There is only so much that we can all handle on our own. A simple call from your best friend is almost worth two weeks of intensive therapy sessions. Throw in a bottle of wine and good conversation, cures all. Your best friend teaches you to love and learn, get up and move on. Every girl has that someone in their life; so in closing, go call her right now and tell her you love her!

About the Author 

Monta Fleming, the mother of three children, serves as an Expert Advisor on multiple household help issues to many organizations and groups, and is a mentor for other “Mom-preneurs” seeking guidance.  She is a regular contributor at You can get in touch with her at: montafleming6Atgmail dotcom.

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0 thoughts on “Healing With Your Best Friend”

  1. Lakshmi Balu says:

    Aww, I love you my best friend! We both are single and the word marriage still is an alien scenario to us. We love making chinese food at a common friend’s place in the weekends and my friend calls it therapy sessions too. I can’t tell you how much I can relate to this article! Great writing!

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